There have been moments where I've been stressed out, overworked, overemotional and generally dead, but now, I think I'm finally starting to turn around.
During the past few days, I've been enjoying myself properly for the first time in months. I've got some really good things going for me now...
I've got a good part in Showstopperz
I've got Techy work
I'm working on a non-documentary film (which is amazing because I've spent the past year editing documentary stuff)
I'm finally starting to get on top of all my work and catch-up
I have wonderful tutors (Jacqueline Sillars-mother of two of my best friends/exs, but that's another story- for English and Mrs Fenn- the nicest and best Maths teacher that ever lived- for Maths
I can finally see an end to all this madness
And I have found my real self and who my real friends are.
I realised a few weeks ago that I can't and won't be bothered with people that have betrayed my trust or hurt me purposely and especially stupid, ignorant arseholes, and I mean that in the broadest and nicest possible sense.
I intend to expose the highland education system for the incestuous, cowardly, immoral 'family' it really is. I've spoken to a lot of people, and I mean a lot in the last 3 months and I find astonishing how so many people can have similar if not the same complaints at the same people and yet not do a damn thing about it.
Well I for one am going to do something about it.
I want to be become rich, famous and successful, not for the money, but for the power to influence and change things for the better so that children and others like me will never be wronged by this sort of thing again.
Don't get me wrong, there are people in the system who are good, all of my subject teachers for example, but they are forced to do what the incestuous higher ups tell then to.
I've also recently decided that I do want to make film my career when I leave school. I've toyed with the idea before, but I really do want to, I think I could be happy doing something else, but film is my passion, sure I don't just go out and film everything and I'm not constantly doing things like that but it's what I do.... It's what defines me as a person and it also brings me unbridled joy like very few other things can, as does my singing.
Reno, in the unlikely event that you're reading this I want to say thank you, thank you for everything... You may not know it but you have been a massive influence on me, I respect you greatly and even when it may not appear like it, I listen to everything you tell me and try to act on it as best I can. Without you I probably wouldn't be back into acting and I never would have found that I actually have a good singing voice. So thank you again... You are truly a brilliant person.
For those of you who don't know who Reno is, he's been my singing teacher for the last year and MD for Showstopperz Juniorz (the musical theatre group I'm part of). He used to be (and I should add, still could be if he wanted to) a very successful opera singer.
He's generally a rather awesome guy :-)
I have had the honour and privilege of working with some of the most talented and amazing people in the entire of Scotland in the past few years at Scottish Youth Theatre but now I'm also getting to work with some amazing people on my doorstep at Showstopperz. I'm afraid I must single out a few of those who really are stars though- Josephine Sillars, Layla Monteith-Grace, Abi'fail' Fraser, Ines Macintyre, Megan Fairley, Rachel Haston.... I mean no offence if your name's not on there, it's just that there's not enough room for all the people I want to say.
This really has turned into a massive ramble but people still seem to read it... I've had over 200 views on my personal blog and close to 700 on the Cerberus Films one.
I don't even know if I have said what I was meaning to say when I started this blog but hey ho.... I find it helps clear my mind.
In going to finish with something I found very amusing the other day whilst wasting time on the Internet.
It's lifted from a friend of mines formspring, if you're reading this, you should know that I do find your tweets hilarious and that they provide much needed joy. (and get some self confidence, you're really talented, go for what you really want, you will succeed, if I do become, as you put it 'a big time director' I will remember you and ask you to work with me)
Anywho... Enough ranting.... On with the twisted hilarity....
Question-"Have you ever experimented with the same sex?"
Answer- "I've kissed a few girls. But that's not 'experimenting'. That's just inebriation."
As always, much love my friends, especially to those of you who really matter to me, I hope you know who you are...
Oliver V. Smith
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